I love the first day of school. The excitement and nervousness is almost tangible. There are students who come so prepared they could probably teach the classes they are taking before even taking them. Then there are the students who are scrambling at the last minute registering for classes, buying their books, and hoping the professors won't notice their late entries into class. I would not put myself in either category, but I think I feel more prepared for this semester than any other, at least physically and perhaps somewhat mentally. Emotionally, however, I don't think I am at all prepared for the inevitable consequence of finishing this semester: GRADUATION. The word carries with it a sense of excitement and accomplishment of completing something honorable. But it also carries with it a word that is handled with both apprehension and dread: CHANGE. For the majority of my life I have not dealt with the implications of this word very well. I like things constant, unwaivering, and with a set plan. Unfortunately, life is not this way nor will it ever be. I say unfortunately only because dealing with change is not yet a strength for me. It is actually a wonderful gift that we have been given. Change, if managed rightfully, is usually for the better. Graduation, for instance, is definitely a change for the better. Though I will most likely deal with withdrawals and longings for this university that has become my home, I will finally be free to use the light I have received from this home and bring that light into a home of my own, wherever that may be. I am actually quite excited about making it through this stepping stone in life. I think I feel this way not only because I will be done with homework and finished with research papers, but also because of a new-found friend. Recently I have been reading a series of novels that I have come to absolutely love. Stephanie Meyer's "Twilight" series has been for me a friend embodied in pages, words, and binding. Though it was not a person speaking advice with a voice that could literally be heard, it had a voice of its own that was just as real. The act of reading the book itself has been for a me a nice distraction from the tough experiences I have had in the past couple of weeks. Then there was the story. As I was reading it, it was almost as if the author was writing my story. No, I have not fallen in love with any vampires lately and I've never met a werewolf in my life, but the emotions Bella was experiencing were the exact same ones penetrating my heart. As she experienced love, so did I. As she felt like she would fall apart due to the gaping hole in her aching heart, so did I. As she dealt with the implications of an impending change, so did I. It's amazing the timing of certain things in our lives. I needed those books during my experiences more than I realized before I decided to read them. I believe that is the purpose of the arts. These creations of humanity are there as beacons of light for the whole of humanity. The artists communicate for others to interpret, to gain light and comfort from the experiences or ideas shared. Each time we read something, or look at a piece of art, or listen to a piece of music, we are interpreting them as it pertains to us and gain from that a bit of help or knowledge that we may not have had without it. And as we grow and go through different events or changes we can look back at that piece of art of music and find solace again from a different perspective. I think that is why we have been asked to read the scriptures so much and so often throughout our lives. They too are there as a beacon of hope and light, literature from the mouth of God to liken to ourselves as is needed in our ever-changing lives. I love the first day of school. I have already learned so much!
